5 Years Ago Today...

Five years ago today I was pregnant...WAY pregnant! I was about to POP pregnant. Five years ago today I had no idea if I was having a boy or a girl...I just knew that whatever it was...I was ready for it to be OUT. OF. ME!

I think I made Tony take to me to the hospital at least 2 times druing my pregnancy...and two times I got sent home. I know I went in on September 6th...I was having contractions but unfortunately those contractions were not doing anything other than causing me pain! They sent me home...again...that makes three!

September 7th is my niece Presley's birthday and I was bound and determined NOT to have my baby on that day...I didn't want the cousins to have to share a birthday (in hindsight...that might have been the easier route to go).

I sat at home all day on the 7th...the U.S. Open tennis tournament was on. I had a notebook beside me keeping track of my random contractions. Mom had come over to sit with me while Tony was at school. She stared at me all day long. A part of me wanted to just yell at her to go away (hormones talking)...a part of me wanted to cry and ask her to make it ALL go away (hormones talking again). So instead I sat in silence for most of the day.

I was nervous. I knew I was getting close and I was scared about labor and delivery. I was scared about epidural needles. I was scared I was not going to be able to endure labor...even with the drugs I was already planning on asking for the minute they admitted me.

I was scared about becoming a mom...my baby's mom. Actually, I was flat out terrified.

That night I endured pain...lots of pain. Pain that made me want to break several 2x4s in half. Pain that made me want to kick Adam's and Eve's hindquarters for eating those stupid apples!

In the early morning hours I woke up Tony and said "Let's go." Of course, he had heard that before. But this time I was not leaving the hospital without a baby or a portable morphine drip...one of the two!

Well thank the Lord above...they did let me stay this time. At 5:55pm on September 8, 2007 I found out I was a mom to a little 6 pound 9 ounce girl...we named her Dotty. With one look at her she stole my heart forever. She let out a loud cry and I let out a sigh of relief...her lungs seemed fine (in the coming months and years those lungs have proven to be more than fine...they are exceptional).

To this day I am amazed they let me take her home. I mean they didn't run a background check...make me answer a true/false test...or even ask me if I knew how to work the diaper disposer thing I had registered for and gotten a month before at my shower! They just checked the carseat...we signed some papers...they checked her wristband...my wristband...and off we went. I mean you have to do more to get a Sam's card!!! They just let anyone have a baby and then take that baby home! CRAZY!!!

I will be honest and say the first two years were tough...the third year came with lots of new challenges...the fourth year things were starting to seem right...and this last year has been the best of all.

Dotty is the joy of my life! She is the reason I do everything I do. She makes me want to be a better Mom...a better person. She is my everything.

Dotty has brought me so much joy that I could never express it all. Oh there have been times I have had to get on to her...I have had to put her in time out...I have had to take away a toy...I have had to spank her tushie. But there have been way more laughs than tears...way more smiles than frowns...way more kisses than "I mean it" stares.

Dotty is about to be five in a few short days. For the last five years I have found I could love more than I ever dreamed possible...I discovered my parents were right when they said, "this is going to hurt me more than it hurts you" right before I got a spanking when I was little (I didn't realize how smart my parents were until I became a parent)...I found out amazing things come in small packages...I learned to love stick people drawings, sticky fingers, and sticks found on the ground that were turned into magic wands...I found my best friend has blue eyes, loves chicken nuggets, and calls me Momma...I found out that the last person I think about before I go to sleep and the first person I think about when I wake up is the person I met on September 8, 2007 at 5:55pm.

Dotty Marie Nichols changed my world when she came in it...and for that I will always be grateful to God.