My Life Needs a Remote Control...

Dotty loves our DVR...she thinks every tv in every place should have a pause button and that all shows she has ever watched should be able to appear again at her command. Dotty also always expects me to drop whatever I am doing in order to work the remote control for her.

While I was in my bathroom getting ready this morning I heard the living room tv come on...then go silent...come on...then go silent...come on...then go silent. I finally got worried and went into the room to see how much I was about to spend on a new tv. What I found was Dotty had learned which button was the "pause" button.

She was a busy girl running from room to room and when I asked her what she was doing to our poor tv...she simply said "I don't want to miss anything Momma so I pause it every time I can't see it."

I wish life were that way. Dotty is growing up so fast and there are times I wish I had a pause button. Sometimes I wish I could freeze the moment and just savor it for a while longer. Other times I wish I had a rewind button...like when Dotty is with Tony and they do all the great fun things they do together I wish I could hit rewind and have her do them again only with me this time...that way neither of us would miss out! (And I am sure Tony feels the same way in regards to Dotty's time with me.)

Life doesn't come with a "pause" or "rewind" button though so we have to make the most of our time. For that reason, I stopped getting ready and sat in the living room with Dotty and watched "Jake and the Neverland Pirates" with her. Of course there were a million things I needed to do but they could all wait. My time with Dotty is precious and because of our life situation I do miss out on a lot of time with her (as does Tony).

I have said for some time now that being divorced is what you want to make of it. If you want to focus on the bad then the divorce will be bad. If you want to focus on the good then the divorce will be good (crazy as that sounds!). Believe it or not (but if you know us...you will believe it) Tony and I have a good divorce. We communicate, we get along, we do things jointly, we can even laugh and joke around with each other. Oh sure there are the not so good times but every relationship has those.

One of the blessings I got from being divorced is that I learned how short my time with Dotty truly is and had I stayed married I might not have realized that until Dotty was heading off to college. Children grow up quickly and you don't get their childhood back...so I try to make the most of my time with Dotty. And I will always be grateful for that life lesson...regardless of how I learned it.