Monday, March 7, 2011

A Gift for Memaw...

Dotty likes to give people "parting gifts" when they leave our house. Sometimes it is one of her toys, sometimes a book, maybe a necklace (hopefully one of hers and not one of mine), every so often it is food or a drink. Many times people just smile and then slip the items back to me without Dotty noticing. Once or twice a kid has been the recipient of a "gift" and those are usually gone forever...so I have to keep a close eye on Dotty as she walks around pondering what would be a nice gift to give in that situation.

Last night Memaw was getting ready to leave and Dotty handed her a wedding picture of Jake and Keri to give to Jake, a picture of Presley when she was about 3 years old to give to Presley, and then she found a picture of my mom and dad taken on a cruise they went on...she gave that to Memaw.

Needless to say my mom was less than thrilled...but she faked it well. She thanked Dotty for such a nice gift and then later on casually put all three pictures back in their original spots.

I thought the whole thing was quite funny but a part of me was very proud of my parents. Even though they are no longer married we do birthday parties and holidays together...Dad, Mom, Jake, Keri, Presley, Dotty, and me...everyone in one place at one time. So far, while Presley and Dotty know that Memaw and Papa don't live in the same house, they don't really understand why yet. And to them Memaw and Papa love each other just like we all love each other...as a family.

I know divorces can be ugly. Feelings can get hurt. People can leave the courthouse and never go within 100 yards of each other ever again. My parents are not like that. Tony and I are not like that. The reason we all get along and behave well...especially in front of Dotty and Presley is for two reasons I believe.

#1 We do it for the girls. We don't want them to see fighting and tension. That will only hurt the girls.

#2 We do it for ourselves. We don't want to be fighting all the time. We don't want to have tension in our lives. We don't want to hurt each other.

The best gift we can give the girls (and in turn ourselves) is a loving family. We may not be traditional but we are, in fact, family.

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